I'll have mine on the side, please...

 

Have you ever noticed how some people can make a whole meal out of condiments? I never really thought much about that til having lunch one day with my mom this week.

We ordered the exact same thing at the eating establishment, and as I sat there at the table, I looked over and realized her lunch was twice the size of my own.

It struck me then... my mom is a condiment abuser. Oh I had secretly somewhat already known this for years. The hoard of little packets of ketchup, mustard, taco sauce, the overflowing frigerator door, not to mention the "extra" bottles in her cabinet left little doubt as to her love of condiments.

It left me wondering what really is the purpose of condiments? Are they to enhance the food already prepared or are they there to cover up a multitude of sins?

Condiments are sneaky. Some condiments are swimming in fat and calories, while some make you feel you can partake wildly because of their fat free status in the condiment world. My mom is guilty of all of them. I don't think I can remember a time that she didn't eat anything without some sort of condiment accompaniment. Chili always needed extra ketchup, mustard, and sometimes honey. Or that holy grail of condiments to her,...honey mustard. Vegetables need a large drizzle of dressing. Meat dishes need a splash of barbeque sauce, or steak sauce, or more ketchup. And don't even get her started on miracle whip and pickles.

It's staggering when you walk down the aisle at the grocery and view all of the condiments available. It can be overwhelming, and some people want to try them all. They want that sense of adventure in the door of their fridge. Which leads me to admitting....I am boring in my condiment collection.

Most times I will order something plain, and will put some ketchup on the side. Oh I like pickles, onions, mustard, etc. But usually just a blob of ketchup will suffice. In fact, ketchup is my go to condiment of choice. Somethings I just don't want to eat if I don't have ketchup for it. It's as if, it no longer is worth the effort if I don't have my ketchup.

Yet I know ketchup is bad for me. It's laden with corn syrup, vinegar, sodium and 57 other ingredients according to Heinz...or maybe they make 57 other condiments, I don't know... I just know I need my ketchup.

I remember as kid going to my grandmother's and just being in awe of her refrigerators (she had 3). Stuffed in the door and on shelves would be almost every condiment imaginable. Ketchup, hot sauce, barbeque, mustard, thousand island dressing, ranch dressing, french dressing, 6 or more kinds of dressing. There would be dill pickle chips, dill pickle spears, sweet pickles, pickle relish, green olives, black olives, pimento cheese, jarred pimentos, jarred peppers. If it was a condiment she most likely had it. A far cry from my ketchup and mustard filled world.

I think a lot of it is what you get use to. I was a picky kid  growing up, and didn't like my food to touch on my plate. Very few foods now  do I use or add more than one condiment too. Sure I have cupboard full of spices and jams and jellies and other things that some consider a condiment. Some of them have been there for ages. I should toss them, but then I worry maybe someone will visit and ask if I have any low sodium soy sauce or hot pepper sauce, stone ground mustard, or bit of mayo instead of miracle whip on their food selections.

It's crazy the love people have for condiments. Most refrigerators will sport at least a couple. In fact most of us have some of the same condiments, even the same brands of those condiments in our kitchens. Some condiments have become so ingrained in our eating habits, we can not enjoy our meal without them.

Last week I watched my mom pour a reddish looking liquid into a large quart jar that she had been cooking. She smiled brightly and told me it had to cool down and then she could put it in her fridge. It was a homemade version of Dorothy Lynch salad dressing she had come across in a cook book. Where she is going to find room in her frigerator door to put it I don't know.

For some people, condiments are a sickness. They just can't do without them. Maybe those people  should be considered as more adventurous eaters. Just ketchup won't do it for them, they need more. Maybe I need to rethink my condiment choices. It's hard to break some habits, I do love my ketchup.

Fess up,...come clean and tell me your condiment cover ups...