Monday, September 17, 2007

Entry for September 17, 2007 - It's All Relative...


*Warning, fluff blog ahead*....

Yes it is me again, with another one of those blogs that is really about nothing in particular but cleverly (or not so cleverly) disguised as a chatty blog entry. I was hoping for something exciting to blog about, but once again life is continuing in it's monotonous path...or rut... whichever way you want to look at it. I wish I could say I was busying living life, but that to me, sounds like I would be saying that I am living it to it's fullest, doing all that I want to do, embracing it with wild abandonment and riding that rollercoaster for all it's worth...but I am not. I am busy ..."being"....

I think life is like that a lot, filled with lots of humdrum,... doing all those things we need to do to survive, to pay bills, to keep a roof over our heads.... Til we have those short sporadic moments of wonderfulness that makes you realize that is what life should be. Most of us if we are honest with ourselves will admit that life has a hold on us and it's not the other way around, that we have a hold on life.

I've been busy this week-end, nothing all that exciting, but busy. Yardwork, garden work, work in general, family, friends ...they all fill up those moments that become yesterdays memories. I have spent a lot of time with family lately. It goes like that sometimes, little spurts of contact and visits and phone calls. You can pick your friends but you can't pick your relatives, and that is very true. Given some of my family members I might think twice upon first meeting them, but in the long run I would pick them. What I should be more concerned about is if they would pick me.

Marriage, birth, death, sickness, divorce, they are all little hiccups in life, some of them maybe even more than just a hiccup. At the moment one family member or another of mine is facing or dealing with those life changing moments....well with the exception of birth. No one is pregnant that I know of, and NO I am not here to tell you that the rabbit died,...so bite your tongue.

I'm am single. No kids. Never married, and that doesn't bother me. I don't think I have to get married, but I still continue to get comments from friends and relatives on getting married and having a family. I'm too old to have a family, I am happy being a family of one. Maybe if I didn't have other relatives I would feel differently....I am not afraid to be alone though. That scares a lot of people, being alone. I will admit I hate to eat out in public alone, travel alone, attend events alone. When I get overwhelmed with so much to do I consider marriage and having family then...but I don't know if marrying someone so they will mow the yard and help weed the garden is a very good reason though. I think my family worries I will be that crazy, eccentric cat lady that lives down the block. I don't know if they can really call me that since all I have is the one cat, Stinkpot, and I am not so sure it likes me...or if it ever will.

Family can be a blessing, and a curse. They can drive you crazy, make you wonder about the gene pool, make you want to rattle those skeletons in the closet, or just plain hide from them. When push comes to shove and life shoves you down, it's family to help pull you up. One of my family members is dealing with divorce. His own family, now fractured and pulled apart has made him pull closer to his "first" family. I have noticed that a lot lately. Kids grow up, they marry, have families of their own, and then their kids grow up and move on and have families of their own. Then those grown up kids who are empty nesters find their way back home.

You grow, you fly, you come back to what you have always known.... your family.

It's all relative....


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